We all know China is an incredibly competitive society, with millions of people struggling for a good job, a good education, a good life.   Young people are under incredible pressure to get into college and, once in college, to find career opportunities afterward.   This story, from China Daily,  shows how wrongly things can go.  I was especially struck by the attitude of the father.  I know that mental illness is complex and not simply the result of stress, but this father is callous and unbending in this desire to make his son into, in the son’s words, "an object to flaunt before the relatives."  The story – not long – is reprinted in full below the jump.  Maybe we should give it a new title: "How not to be a parent."

Man insane after failing exams
By Liu Dan (chinadaily.com.cn)
Updated: 2006-02-09 14:56

 

Recently, following the end of the festive Chinese Spring Festival, a young
man was been sent to a mental hospital after four years of postgraduate
examination failures beginning from 2002.

Twenty-nine-year-old Wang Xiaoxiang (alias) was born in a farmer’s family in
Changzhou City of East China’s Jiangsu Province, and his father pinned much hope
of success on him.

"I wanted my son to be a postgraduate student. Surprisingly he couldn’t
endure the pressure and went insane, but I don’t regret my decision. I just feel
sad about that," Wang’s father said.

According to Xu, Wang’s roommate in Southeastern University where they
prepared for the exam, he began to notice a change in Wang as they lived and
studied together from 2002 to 2005.

In 1993, wanting a good study environment for their son, who they hoped would
be a talented person in the future, Wang’s parents let him be adopted by a
couple of teachers in a key provincial high school.

Wang spent his six-year junior and senior high school period in the family of
his adopted parents. Under such a demanding study environment, he successfully
passed the college entrance exam and enrolled in the Harbin Industrial
University.

On hearing the news Wang’s parents were very happy and decided to take him
back home. But according to Xu, Wang said he felt distant from his parents and
felt they did not treat him as their natural child but rather as an object to
flaunt before the relatives.

Because of Wang’s parents’ opposition of finding a job after college, he was
forced to lodge in Southeastern University, where he began preparing for the
school’s postgraduate examination.

In 2002, Wang gave up the exam due to insufficient preparation. And in the
following three years, his exam marks were far short of the entrance mark. After
that Wang frequently displayed abnormal tendencies, and went insane.

"My son now is in good hands, and will be fully recovered in several months,"
said Wang’s father.

The father still reiterated that he and his wife had no fault and that their
son could not understand their good intention. In any case, poor endurance on
the boy’s part and huge pressure from the parents made this
tragedy.