A story a couple of day's ago in the NYT reports:

For insights into healthy marriages, social scientists are looking in an unexpected place.

A growing body of evidence shows that same-sex couples have a great
deal to teach everyone else about marriage and relationships. Most
studies show surprisingly few differences between committed gay couples
and committed straight couples, but the differences that do emerge have
shed light on the kinds of conflicts that can endanger heterosexual
relationships.

    It seems that gender inequalities in heterosexual marriages can feed into unspoken resentments that attenuate and weak relationships.  And then, when arguments happen, those differences can worsen based on how men and women handle uncomfortable verbal confrontations:

“When they got into these really negative interactions, gay and
lesbian couples were able to do things like use humor and affection
that enabled them to step back from the ledge and continue to talk
about the problem instead of just exploding,” said Robert W. Levenson,
a professor of psychology at the University of California, Berkeley.

The
findings suggest that heterosexual couples need to work harder to seek
perspective. The ability to see the other person’s point of view
appears to be more automatic in same-sex couples, but research shows
that heterosexuals who can relate to their partner’s concerns and who
are skilled at defusing arguments also have stronger relationships.

    That ability to see another person's point of view sounds like the approach to Humanity that Confucius urges on us:

…As for Humanity: if you want to make a stand, help others make a stand, and if you want to reach your goal, help others reach their goal.  Consider yourself and treat others accordingly: this is the method of Humanity. (6.29)

     In other words, we can only find ourselves through our relationships with others.   So, if we really want to develop ourselves to our fullest capacities, we must do so in concert with others; and that entails understanding not only ourselves in relation to others but also others in relation to us.